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leupagus:

disappointingpopsiclejokes:

Disappointing Popsicle Jokes

HOW IS THIS A DISAPPOINTING POPSICLE JOKE
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unamusedsloth:

"CAN’T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG?"
( 30292 ) 7 hours ago - Reblog
"No one asked, at any point, if Mitt Romney might give up on his presidential ambitions because he wanted to spend more time with his litter of grandkids. Fuck, no one even asked in 2012 if Tagg Romney would do less on the campaign trail because he just got two new babies. No one asked because not only did no one care, but because everyone assumed that things would go on as normal because that’s what the fuck people do, men, women, grand or otherwise. The only reason anyone is talking about this is because Hillary Clinton has lady parts. And, no matter how you wanna sputter, “But…no,” it comes out sexist."
( 4833 ) 9 hours ago - Reblog
salazar: hey everyone just wanted your opinion on something
helga: shoot
salazar: okay what if we get giant versions of our house symbols
rowena: what
salazar: like godric would have a giant lion chilling out somewhere and rowena would have a big canary
rowena: its an eagle
salazar: okay whatever
godric: i dont think uh
salazar: it cant be too hard to find a huge badger
godric: okay dude wtf no this is ridiculous absolutely no giant house symbols
salazar: oh um okay because i kind of uh
helga: what did you do
salazar: NOTHING
( 61530 ) 11 hours ago - Reblog
Maleficent casting the spell: The princess shall indeed grow in grace and beauty, beloved by ALL who know her...
16 years later
Maleficent: fuck I fucked up I FUCKED UP
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"'Well if you wake up intending to murder someone at two o'clock, you hardly think what you're going to feed the corpse for dinner.'
‘Aspargus is in season,’ said Francis helpfully."
The Secret History - Donna Tartt (via nereiids)

(Source: frncisabernathy)

( 402 ) 20 hours ago - Reblog